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!Saturday, January 10, 2009

@ 4:01 PM

they say, you must be poor to taste the novelty of the rich, be really evil to know what is good, be really unfeeling to experience the magical feel. often i have questioned this sentence, thinking that by listening to people's experiences and learn from it, i too can feel the extreme without going through the other. and it's true, 2008 have been a weird year for me, i have unravelled so many shocking things, newer shocking things now doesn't seem shocking to me anymore.

it's also through my own experience that i significantly learn how to empathetize, to understand and to silently support different notions. in the past i thought by listening i would actually understand. while i used to understand, going through some things just stir every bit of soul inside of me. then i realize, you really have to go through it to feel it. understanding it is not as important anymore.

so what holds for me in 2009? time at the moment is just a phrase that we go through, a period of events. 2009 will come to me after my graduation in SP, when we enter a new significant period of events (workforce, futher studies anyone?)

and one thing that never fails to surprise me is the judgement and un-judgement that my sister has showered me with. most of all love. after the bouts of scolding i got from many different people (including her), she then immerse herself into my situation and reach out to me. it is this gesture that i feel eternally grateful to her, for not judging me after judging me, for being by my side whether i'm wrong or right. but she tackles everything logically and objectively, just like everyone else. which i'm still figuring out if it is a good thing. or not.

it is rare to find someone who will really feel what you are going through, unless the person of course, went through it. so i say, live and make do with it!

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